Forgetting
Masresha was a name I encountered twice last week during my travels in East Gojjam.It means, "Through you I will forget." In some cases, they specify that it means "through you I will forget your father."
The woman of East Gojjam live through a lot that I imagine they would want to forget. Many are circumcised within 10 days of birth, a process which not only robs of them of sexual pleasure for life but can also cause a type of fistula, where their urine drains out through their vagina. The traditional practice is to betroth them to future grooms anywhere from birth to 6 years old; at 6, 7, 8, they will go to live with their husband's family. The marriage is often consummated when the girl is anywhere from 9-13. Sometimes she will get pregnant before she has ever seen her period.
Giving birth at 12 or 13 years old is a tricky business, particularly for malnourished girls whose hips haven't formed yet. Many die; many have long, obstructed labors, and the family will only bring them into the hospital when death is near. The fetus rarely survives, and if the girl child does, she is often left barren, and with obstetric fistula or a collapsed birth canal, rendering her an social outcast, because her only useful function in life--to bear her husband children--has been destroyed. The smell of fistula (this time, where the wall between the vagina and anus is torn) repels her family and friends, and she will be divorced, and sent back home to make a another, less desirable match, or kicked to the streets to find her own living. Some run away and go to the cities, where they will become servants or prostitutes; both short-lived and difficult existences.
Sometimes I can't find the words to express just how insane the difference can be between my life and that of a woman born here.
posted by Margot @ 1:24 AM
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